Why I Don't Have Stage Fright When I Perform

I’ve been performing solo for about three years in settings like bars, restaurants, talent shows, and other local places. Sometimes people ask me how I’m able to play in front of an audience. “I could never do that,” is a common remark that I get. When I first began to play publicly, I had no confidence in what I was doing, but now I’m more comfortable behind a microphone and guitar in hand than I am anywhere else.

Starting Off With Some Wise Words

               Toward the end of eighth grade I started taking guitar and vocal lessons from the teacher I currently have now, who is in a band herself. She always encourages her students to perform (it really does make you better). So, sure enough, within a few months she had brought me out to one of her events to do a few songs. I was terrified, but I did it. Then, I participated in front of my whole middle school for the talent show. No other performance has ever filled me with more fear than that one. I didn’t even really want to do it. But, bless our choir director—he told all of us who signed up something I’ll never forget. To put this in context, there was an evening performance that students and adults could come to, then there was another performance the next day at school during an assembly/pep rally. Some of us were comfortable enough for the evening show, but afraid to go out in front of our peers. Before the evening show, he said, “I know some of you asked if you have to go tomorrow. The answer is no, but I’m just saying, if you’re nervous about performing in front of everyone tomorrow, or afraid, and decide not to go, that’s losing the battle without even putting up a fight. If you choose not to go tomorrow, you’re putting up your white flag, and they’ve already won.” He continued on with more pep-talk encouragement about our passions that I can’t recall verbatim. His words gave me the confidence to go on stage the next day, which is really the hardest part.

Ways to Overcome Stage Fright (What I Did)

               The most effective cure for a fear is simply to face it. I know it’s cliché, and surely isn’t easy sometimes. When I am afraid about a certain song or certain person in the audience that I know, the fear always leaves once the song begins. Starting is often the hardest and scariest part. Once I’m playing, I’m focused on the notes, keeping a consistent beat, and all of the emotions the song makes me feel. It’s almost impossible to be afraid during those three to five minutes, trust me—especially if it’s well-rehearsed.

              

               The second most valuable way to overcome your fear, after facing it, is to face it often. I’d say that the main reason I’m so comfortable during gigs is that I’m so used to it. I’ve done it so much that it doesn’t even phase me. If you’re doing what you love, eventually you will find this, too. Music is my passion, and, after the initial fear of performance, it’s just natural for me to do and to share with others.

               The last bit of advice that I have is that nobody cares. Of course I mess up—I do it every time I play somewhere. I’ll play the wrong chord, sing the wrong verse, forget to take a breath when I need to, or even sometimes forget some of the words.  Over the course of two hours of playing, it’s almost inevitable. That’s the thing: nobody is going to focus on the few seconds that I messed up out of an entire two-hour set. I know that not everyone is playing or singing for such a long period of time, though. Last year, I took a voice class at school where we had to sing a solo (without my precious guitar as my shield) about once every week. We even had to hear thoughts and critiques from our classmates on the spot right afterwards. It was definitely out of my comfort zone, but I wasn’t scared. After watching everyone else in the class do their pieces, I realized that I could barely remember how everyone did at the end of class. Sure, the people who blew me away (because of how good they were) stuck out a bit more, but I didn’t even think about any of the performances once they were over. I didn’t instantly remember how well or how badly someone did the next time we were together, and didn’t associate any performances with what I thought about those people. So, why would anyone else? Honestly, the truth is, a bad performance isn’t very interesting, anyway, so don’t worry about people thinking too much of it even if you do have one.

Messing Up

               When you do mess up (yes, everyone does), the best thing to do is keep going. Don’t quickly play that measure or note over again just to get it right. Keep going as if it never happened. This looks much more professional, and usually people won’t even notice you messed up if you don’t show it. It also won’t affect the timing of anyone else who may be playing with you. If you forget the words, sing the words that you do know. For example, if you forget the second verse of a song, sing the first verse again in its place (assuming it musically fits), then jump back in with what you do remember. If you’re in an informal setting and can play and sing at the same time, make a joke or something about forgetting the words while playing through that part, and go back into what you remember. If none of these are an option, just act as if there’s a break in there and you’re intentionally not coming in yet, instead of turning into a deer in the headlights.

Even if you truly don’t yet have confidence in what you do, fake it while playing. A song will always sound better when performed with confidence than when performed anxiously or quietly.

“No one is you, and that is your power.” –Dave Grohl

Do you perform or have experience with stage fright? What are some other tips or stories that you have? Let me know in the comments!